Only a few minutes

I have only a few minutes before Alexander might be waking up from his nap, but I thought I would check in.

I have a ton of things swirling through my mind and the biggest one is that I have to lose about 50 pounds. That is an incredibly daunting thought. I did rejoin WW and that's all well and good, but I actually have to *use* WW to my advantage. I have to work the program instead of waiting for it to work for me. Maybe I need to work out some kind of system of payment. A dollar for every .2 lost? That would be $5 a pound. A total of $250 once I've lost the 50 I'd like to lose...not enough for a whole new wardrobe, but enough for a couple of massages. I should also make a list of things I will do for myself as I lose...maybe when I lose my first 5 pounds, I'll treat myself to a nice pedicure....

I don't know, I'm at a loss. I want to lose this weight because I know that I will feel better about how I look in clothes (I know my other mental demons will be there, no worries) and I know that once Alexander is mobile that being more fit will make it easier on me.

Please, I need some ideas here, so if you can, please reply with some...

Shake it, don't break it, took your mama 9 months to make it.

Jeez, I do love the subject-o-matique on Yahoo! What fun.

No pictures tonight...I have new ones on my camera, but I am too tired to upload them right now...sorry all you Alexander fans. He is doing really well, though. He laughing and smiling like a champ. He's gotten quite good at sleeping solidly most nights, sometimes for up to 7 and a half hours. He takes after his father in that respect...Chris can sleep anywhere at anytime. All he needs to do is stay quiet and motionless for about 5 minutes and he's out like a light.

Weight Watchers didn't go well for me this past week. I didn't even go to my Wednesday night meeting. We had a bit of a family crisis that involved driving back and forth from New York to Connecticut a number of times during this past week. It's all over now, and I am back at the helm, so to speak.

Oooh, and I signed up for a knitting class! It takes place this Sunday at a yarn/knitting store around the corner from Silver Tips tea room (still my favorite place). It's a class about knitting baby sweaters. How cool is that? After the class I am meeting my mom and my brother's girlfriend at the tea room for some yummy lunch. The potential for a fabulous day is incredible.

Everything is fine! I promise!

Alexander is now 8 weeks old! The doctor measured him at 14 pounds and 25 inches long. This kid is a bruiser and he's only getting bigger!

He's been trying to get his thumb in his mouth with limited success. He gets it in there about once every 25 attempts. I think he'll figure it out. His biggest issue is he doesn't realize that in order to get the thumb in his mouth he has to not enclose it within the rest of his fingers.






Alexander is also smiling now, not just for gassy reasons. It's so much fun trying to get him to smile...sometimes he giggles, too and it's extra fun! I didn't think he cold get any cuter, but it happened.

In Alanna news, Weight Watchers is going okay. Week one went well, week two is not so great. I think I have lost weight, but I haven't been tracking. It's been a bad WW week...I had to go back to work, and my favorite Aunt has been in the hospital in another state and we've been going to visit her, so eating has not been the best, but I've been trying to make the best decisions available.









This is just a picture of Alexander wearing Reuben's ear like a hat. I couldn't help it, I had to do it!

we never once talked about a blow dryer

I am resorting to using the Subject-o-Matique on yahoo to get blog titles. It works for me, so I'm going with it.

Alexander is now 6 weeks old. I can't believe that 6 weeks has flown by already! And strangely, it seems as if he's always been around. I don't know what I would do if he weren't.

Last night he went to bed at midnight, which is a little late for him, but he was a tad fussy and at this point in his life, I like to go with the flow. This morning I woke up at 6:30 and I freaked. I ran over to his bed and put my hand on his belly...and yes, he was breathing. He has never slept more than 5 hours straight before, and 6 and a half hours is quite a jump!

I had my 6 week post-partum check up yesterday and all is well. My doctor did advise me to stay home from work for another week because of the c-section, so instead of going back to school this Thursday, I go next Thursday. I'm glad that I have plenty of sick days to cover the extra time and still have some left over in case I get sick during the winter.

Tomorrow night is the big WW night. I've decided to go back to the Wednesday night meetings, even though they is a big gap between work and the meeting, but I figure I can pick up the little guy and go grocery shopping during that gap as there is an A&P down the road from the WW center.

Confessions

I have to confess to all of you in blogland that I have not been doing WW for ummmm...like two months or so. I have moments of uncontrollable hunger, slight nausea, fatigue...it's unlike anything I've ever experience before.

Yeah, you guessed it. I'm pregnant. I'm due on August 6th. I'm hoping that once the baby is born I'll be back to tri'ing like I get paid by the hour and not turn this into a mommy blog whose title has been changed to Cry Like You Get Paid by the Hour or or something equally obnoxious.

So there you have it...now you all know why I've been mostly absent and evasive when I actually have posted. Sorry for the delay! Now that my big secret is out in the open, I think I'll be around more often as I'll be able to share more freely.

Chris and I are also house hunting, so this is a time of exhaustion and stress! Nothing like making 2 major life changes at the same time, right?

Cuh-razy!

I'm am going a little nuts at the moment, but it should all end shortly, thank God. I'll be sharing all about that once all the piece fall into place...there is a chance that none of the pieces will fall into place, and I'll report out regardless of the end results. I feel as if I'm juggling 3 things at the moment...two of which are intense and one is just plain fun, but the timing has to be just right.

On the Weight Watchers front, I'm thinking about giving the 30 pounds in 100 days challenge again. Tomorrow will be day one of 100 in and we'll see how it goes. I can't ask for anything more. My starting weight is 183...it's an official WW weight.

Me and my freaky, stressed out, bride-of-Frankenstein haired self will be back tomorrow (I hope!)

Early bird gets the worm. But what about the early worm?

I still love the suject-o-matique on Yahoo. It's all good fun.

Tonight was my WW meeting. Lost 2 pounds this week, which I attribute to running and almost follwing plan. By almost I mean that I followed plan but for dinner on Friday and Sunday nights, I didn't. I figure I ate all (if not more) of my flexies on those nights. Any extranious points used during the weekdays were APs. I don't know if that'll work for me this upcoming WW week, but we'll see.

I think I'm going to treat myself to a massage this weekend. I haven't had one in a while and I think that I deserve one...between the actually running a bunch of times and I'm a little sore. Friday is payday, and I think I can scrape the money together.

Despite running and getting to the gym (did I mention that? I don't think so) I have been having trouble sleeping. Chris, my evil husband, thinks it's entertaining to make noise so that I freak out while half asleep. He doesn't do this often, but did it to me the other night. In my half asleep stupor, I think I threatened to kill everyone in the world. I am not a night person. So, as a result, let me apologize for threatening to kill you all. Sorry about that, I was half asleep. I'm hoping to get in a solid 7-8 hours tonight.

Also, the stereo in my Subaru decided to stay on forever. I can't turn the channel, I can't control the volume, it won't take CDs. Even when I turn off the car, the digital screen stays on. Subaru is going to replace the whole thing, but in the mean time I have to listen to 1010 Wins at a medium volume.

rotating platinum pants

I had no idea what to title this, and I nearly titled it "Happy Thursday", but I used the subject-o-matique on yahoo email instead. Rotating platinum pants is loads more interesting.

I decided that I need to post more frequently...that way anyone who comes here might be compelled to comment more frequently. Sounds like a plan, right? So here's what going on in my life:

1. Had to skip the gym yesterday. Ian (the baby brother) had a meeting at 3 that went long. I could have gone to the gym, but I was not willing to give up my WW meeting.
2. I gained a pound last week, but I figure that sometimes the 3 steps forward and one step back approach is not a deadly one and I still have a total loss of 2 pounds this WW go around, so I'm happy. I decided that I'd like to lose 2 pounds this week, so I took a bright yellow garage sale sticker with a pink "2" written in it. It's now living at the top of my computer screen so I see it all day. It's rather bright, so my eyes are attracted to it. It disappears after a bit, but it's still there, reminding my subconscious mind that my goal is 2 pounds.
3. Tonight is parent-teacher night. I like meeting the parents. Unfortunately, we don't get to see so many because apples don't grow on pear trees, and if you have and ED or school phobic kid, you can guess that more than likely, the parent is ED or school phobic. It's not true in all cases, but enough to make it true.

This is all I have for you lovelies. I'll come back again soon with some pictures I took this week that I think are totally cool. Check ya then!

Week One? All done.

I lost 3 pounds this week despite my falling off the core wagon a couple of times. I'm happy...but the true measure will be when I take my chub rub measurements next Sunday. Then all will be official.

I'm sorry that I haven't been around as much as I'd like...especially when it comes to reading all your blogs. I'm still reading, I'm just not commenting. Work has been a bear. I don't have my set schedule yet...but I'm getting closer with every moment. I've been pitching in extra at work to help out because I don't have the set schedule yet, so I have the flexibility to do so...and it's running me ragged. It's completely worthwhile because it helps keep the kids "in line" and my principal has told me more than once this week that he appreciates how much extra work I'm doing when times are tough. It's always good to make a positive impression on the new boss-man. I would have done it anyway...it keeps things calm!

It's all new!

Okay, so maybe it's not "all" new. I finally went back to Weight Watchers. I had not been to that meeting house in so long, that they no longer had my booklet. I had to start all over again. New folder, new books, new everything. Honestly, I couldn't ask for a better situation. There is nothing to remind me of past failures. It's a clean state. Joan, my WW leader (who is incredibly awesome) thought this was a great thing...a fresh new start. Just what I needed! So, I've been doing really well with Core today, and I hope it continues. We'll see if I survive happy hour tomorrow...

Also, I've decided not to pay too much attention to the scale. Sometimes, you can find a way to cheat the scale: no water, skipping lunch, etc...but you can't cheat THE TAPE MEASURE. In an effort to reduce my chub and how it rubs I am going to start measuring myself every 2 weeks. I think that will be the best medicine for defeating the chub rub.

And I think I've decided what my reminder will be. Let me start off by saying that I really wanted to find something that could be with me at all times. I believe I'm going to buy myself a ring. I found several nice ones on ETSY, I'm just waiting for the "right" one to show up (I'm not all that into jewelry). There is a woman who will customize a saying or a word on a simple ring, but I can't think of anything that would give me purpose without calling out "hey, I'm trying to loose the chunk". If I think of something, I might do that.

Bronx Zoo

I spent mid day today at The Bronx Zoo with Mom and Ian. I'm estimating that all that walking earned me about 6 activity points, so double cool!

I might add more pics once I get the ones my mom took!

I'm feeling really motivated so far this week. I'm thinking it's going to last.

Hanging in there

I had a rough start to the week, and I screwed up yesterday when I went with my mom and the local elementary school volunteer "grandma" to a tea room. It was wonderful! So I actually started logging in food today. I don't care if I wind up with negative flexies as long as I get it all down on paper. It's a start, right? One thing at a time, one thing at a time.

What have I done?

I think I screwed the pooch...now that I have sitemeter, and I can see how many people visit here, I feel compelled to be funny, charming and work on my writing skills. It's a little stressful. I'm sure it'll pass. I have to admit that the sitemeter thing is awesome. I had a hit from a European country today. Who knew? I sure didn't, but I'm glad I know now!

On another note, I'm back from WW and I'm down to 181.4, which is different from my Fatbloke weight. Strange, but true. I consider them to be separate entities, and life goes on. I'm feeling more back on track with food choices, which is awesome, but I'm struggling with the journaling thing. The 12 week planners don't do it for me...I feel conspicuous when I use them. I've tried using notebooks, but because I feel the need to transform them to be more WW friendly, they become too time consuming. I'm at a loss. Do any of you have a journaling system that works for you? I'm curious to know.

I'm also going to start running again. Just running. At least at first. I think that in the past I've tried to do too much when it comes to exercise and I get overwhelmed. I think I'm going to focus on the running, and maybe do some push-ups and various ab exercises at home. Once I get into a good routine with that, then I'll add spin or swimming.

The 600th New Beginning

I have been so ambivalent about doing the right thing when it comes to my body, it's not even funny. I am just not a happy person when it comes to eating, exercising, or feeling good about any of it. Yeesh! New plan of action? You betcha!

1. I am going to use a marbled notebook to write down my food. It has a ton more room and if I'm feeling crappy or I feel the need to record my mood, I've got the space. Also, I won't feel so conspicuous. Plus, because I'm going back on Core, if I'm having a hungry day, I might need the room for various fruits and veggies.


2. Even though I didn't want to, I went to a WW today. I went in between meetings so I got to hear the program spiel that I've heard before, but never from Joanie, the wonder leader.


3. I cooked a healthy dinner tonight. I cooked enough so that I can bring some to class tomorrow.


4. I need to get a good night of sleep tonight. That might make all the difference tomorrow. I'm currently taking a fabulous class about being a teacher leader. It's a great class, the professor is incredible, but the class itself is intellectually draining.

On the positive side, I have been drinking more than my fair share of water. I'm relieve to report that I've got that minor thing on my side.

Now for the down and dirty...has anyone else had Panera Bread's Cinnamon Crunch bagel with reduced fat Hazelnut cream cheese? Good lord...it's fabulous, so stay the frick away!

A Quick Update

I just got back from my WW meeting and I lost a pound, so I'm now officially 179.2. Nice!

WI!

I lost 2.8 this week! Yee-haw. I think I've found the right combination to make it all work....exercise, low stress, and huge amounts of fresh cherries!

No exercise today, just various errands and then a cool hour floating around the club pool...heaven.

Have a safe 4th, everyone!

July 1

I couldn't come up with a good, or even so-so title for today's post, so I didn't bother.

Things are going okay...the scale showed a smaller number this morning, but I can't let myself get too excited, I still have to work at it until Tuesday at 4. I also took my mom for a 6 mile bike ride this morning on her new bike. That went pretty well. I earned 2 APS for that, and I've got 9 flexies left until next meeting. Not bad...not bad at all.

I think I'm going over to my old WW boards stomping ground and rejoin the Ironman training board where you tried to get iron distances in over the period of a month. I think it's do-able since I'm on vacation. Can't hurt to try, right?

The last thing I've got to say is: I am so happy that it's cherry season! I could eat cherries all day long! And they are core...

dying

Ugh, I am just dying to get into a routine. the working 12 hour days, 3 days a week thing is killing me. I used to be worried about what I was going to do with my days during summer vacations, but now I long for those mornings where I don't actually have to do anything and I can lie in, or get up and go to the gym, or for a bike ride, or go to Starbucks, or go to the library (as a patron!) Just one more week after tomorrow and I'll be home free. Then I'll be able to get into a regular Weight Watchers routine again. I haven't been to a meeting in 2 weeks. I just don't have the time or motivation. If I'm not at work (like I am right now) I'm in my pajamas at home.

I've basically given up on the 30 in 100 and I thin I need to restart it when school ends...maybe make it a tad shorter....I don't know. I need suggestions, people!

I would like to give a shout out to my blogger buddy, Marta, who weighed in at 165! I am completely jealous and insanely proud of her.

I'm a baaaaaad blogger

I don't know what day it is in the 30 in 100 scheme. It's hot. My students are all freaked out because of the heat, plus the upcoming summer vacation can be intimidating to emotionally disturbed kids...they thrive on routine. And, who wants to be ED and then stay home and hang out with your ED parents? Apples don't grown on pear trees...at least most of the time.

I did lose 2 pounds at last weigh in, so I'm quite happy about that. Especially since I went to 3 BBQs last weekend. Crazy.

I'm sorry this is so random and strange. I'll be a better blogger later on, I promise!

Day 29...Taking it as it comes

My official WI? I'm up 2 pounds, but I'm sure it's temporary. After all my peevishness the other day, I feel more ready to do this than ever. I am going running this afternoon (if my principal doesn't keep us past our usual release time). I got a sugar free vanilla latte this morning (core) instead of a toffee nut latte (2 points)...hey, 2 points is 2 points...over 7 days? 14 points. I am just trying to be extra careful this week. If I'm going to lose 30 pounds by the middle of July, I've got some catching up to do...and being judicious with my flexies is the way to do it.

I'm feeling totally mellow today. I'm at my desk, listening to a CD I made over the winter. I'm just in good spirits...could be that I'm wearing really comfy jeans today....who knows. It could be that I finally sat with all my sewing crap and made myself a yoga mat bag...I'll have to take pictures of it later. It came out pretty darn good, if I do say so myself, considering I can barely sew a straight line with a sewing machine! (I'll post pictures in the near future)

Thanks again to all of you who had such nice things to say to and share with me. I really appreciate it!